Ok As jessa always says patience is very important, I used my same wire but this time I soldered to 2 caps at the same time which shouldn't have made any difference but there was significantly less heat in the area were the wire was soldered.
Also as you all recommended the ground point should be larger so I just used clamps onto a screw hole and there was almost 0 heat on that point so it was easier to find small amounts of heat in the areas nearby
so thanks again to everyone that helped finding this solution

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